How do you get a retard out of a tree?
Wave at them.
You Jokes
Have you guys heard about the crazy shadow glitch in the game Sonic X? Just google "Sonic X Shadow."
What do you call an Asian who gets a B?
It's not a B-sian.
Dead.
If you are what you eat,
why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
What do you call it when you choose Panera Bread over something else?
Panera instead.
Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.
For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
How do you stop an argument between two deaf people? Switch off the lights.
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
If you hate what you hear from Nickelback, at least you can get your nickel back.
If you have to deal with the noise from Deftones... unfortunately, not only are you unable to obtain any refund, but you may have become permanently deaf.
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.
What do you call a Mexican with one leg?
Border hopper.
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need.
A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"
The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."
Did you hear about the fire at Noelle's place?
Her sister is a real Dess-ember!
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
