You Jokes

Sex

Mother: We need to talk about sex...

Jason: Oh, sex, tell me what do you wanna know.

Jason had a big whooping from his mother and big spanking from his dad.

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Food

What do you say after you go out for middle eastern food? I falafel (feel awful)!

Guy

So this guy we talked to wanted me to leave forever, and we said, "What? You never want to hear from me again?"

Guy

How can you tell if a gay guy has a high sperm count?

Chew when you swallow!

Sea

If you thought other puns were bad, wait till you sea mine.

Number

You take four, then you put a "n" at the end, then you take the "u" out, then you replace the "f" with a "p". What do you get?

Name

Your name is so damn retarded you got sent to the animal farm.

Location

You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.

Shed

A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,

"Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."

Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."