You jokes
Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?
Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.
Jake: Can I go outside?
Mom: Did you clean your room?
Jake: No.
Mom: Then f*ck no.
Jake: Alright, bet.
(Brother named No)
What do you call a teen wizard who just went through puberty?
Hairy Potter.
When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.
*America shoots down balloon*
China: "You killed an innocent man!!"
USA: "What?!"
China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did.
I did who?
You did a poo.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
M.C. Grill
What do you call a fat spеaky in a wheelchair spеaky chair?
"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.
If you are a big fan of me, go to the movie and I kill the bad guys. If you don't, I will be mad and I will be sonic.exe lol.
Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
Roses are red, violets are blue. You belong in a zoo, but don't worry, I'll be there too. Just not in a cage, I'll be laughing at you.
You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Island.
Island who?
Island the one that knows you!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Little old lady, you don't need to yodel about it. Yodel who? Yodel who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Stephen.
Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."
Kid: Dad, where do you work?
Dad: I.C.U.P.
Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.