You jokes
Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?
When you're in the war and you die and say to God, "Where is the gulag?"
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.
Have you seen the movie "Constipated?"
It hasn’t come out yet.
Me: Mom, would you get mad at me for something I didn't do?
Mom: No.
Me: Ok, good. I didn't do my homework.
You know what you could use? An orphan as a punching bag.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Q: What do you call America in a year? A: A wasteland.
Ok, I put one penny down. Do you smell anything?
1 scent.
I put two pennies down. Do you see any fruit?
2 pears.
I put three pennies down. Do you see any law enforcement?
3 coppers.
I put four pennies down. Do you see any cars?
4 Lincolns.
I put five pennies down. Do you see any pussies?
NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT!
What do you call a bunch of microcephalics in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
Throw a plate.
It’s broken, right?
Say “sorry” to it.
Did it fix back?
No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)
Did you know that dogs started the street craps game?
If I stepped on a Twix, would you get mad?
Me: What do you call 4 depressed kids?
My friend: What?
Me: The Suicide Squad.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
Suicide squad.
What do you call your angry French aunt?
A crossaunt.
Welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make 'em, we take 'em!
What did the orphan say to his mom?
Where are you?
What's the difference between a blonde and a car door? The harder you slam the blonde, the looser it gets.
How are Tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like.
What did the brother say to the other brother? "You are brother, brother."