You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
You Jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, don't look in my backyard, or I will come for you.
My friend: Hey, I got 15 kills!
Me: I got 60 kills!
My friend: I didn't know you played Call of Duty!
Me: What's Call of Duty?
Me: Truth or dare?
Crush: Dare.
Me: I dare you to give me your phone number.
Crush: Umm nevermind, truth.
Me: Ok, what is your phone number?
You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.
Your forehead is so big, you think in 4K.
Your forehead is so big when you walk by I can't see what's in front of me.
You're so fat, you lasted a whole year on the cross just off of your fat.
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
You live in the airport.
Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.
You're so poor you put paper cutlery in the dishwasher.
You're so poor, if I ever broke into your house, I'd give you things.
Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.
What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
One like and whatever you say in the comments I'll do, but one rule: it can only be 2-4 hours in or out of Gloucestershire and South Gloucestershire.
