You jokes

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought the Grinch was ugly until I saw you.

Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.

Unless you force them the point.

You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇

How do you organize a space party? You "planet" with some "cheddar" and "brie"-pare for launch!

What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.

What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.

Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion?

There was nothing left but de-brie.

Bro, I gotta tell you a joke.

Nevermind, it's too cheesy!

You text someone to ask them why they snobbed you. Then they snob you again.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I took a poo, and it smelt like you.

My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."

Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.

1, 2 look at your shoes.

3, 4 they look better than yours.

5, 6 you have no friends.

7, 8 you look like a ape.

9, 10 don't you like men?

11, 12 hell naw I like females.

You're shorter than a thumbtack, like, boy, your auntie is probably taller than you.

Did you hear about the red and blue ships that collided? All the sailors were marooned.

A man comes to a bar and has a drink. Then his bully came to him and stole his drink. Then the bully asked, "What's wrong?"

The man said that "I'm trying to kill myself. I tried getting hit by a train, but the train went on a different track. Then I tried to jump off a bridge, but I fell on a boat full of pillows. Then I tried to poison myself."

Then the bully says, "Then what?" Then the man replied, "You just drank it." Then the man left.

1, 2 you built like a dork.

3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.

How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.

What do you call a blind German man?

A Nazi.

What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?

Predator.

Fam, you weaker than a polar bear!