You jokes
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
Did you hear about the light bulb party? Yeah, it was pretty lit!
If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?
How ISS greets their friend.
"You the BOMB!"
I had a friend named Wemiyoe... We call him "we me you."
What do you call a friendly noise? A sound wave.
Did you hear the score in the Egypt vs Ethiopia football game? Egypt 8, Ethiopia didn't.
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.
What do you call a pie made by an octopus? Octopie.
What do you call all down syndromes?
Twins.
Why is it so hard to make a party on Earth?
Because you need to planet.
A horse says to the other horse, "Are you hot?"
The other horse says, "Ahhhh, a house that talks!"
What did Saskia say to Brandon?
Saskia: "Can you rape me like you did Sydney?"
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.
That was a horrible pun. You should be sent to the PUN-itentiary!
Fuck you, biiiiiitch!