Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
How do you fit 15 babies into a shoe box?
A blender.
How do you get them out of the shoe box? A straw.
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
How do you stay warm in a cold room?
You go to the corners. It's always 90 degrees.
When you see a deer, what do you say?
"Oh deer!"
Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide?
Dave: No.
Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
What do you do when life gives you lemons? Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist. 🙂💊💉
All you need is a razor blade in life.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them XD
What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.
You people are sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!! None of these are funny. Sick sick sick!!!!!!!
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.
We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.
What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?
A virgin.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip off.
How do you make a dead baby float?
1 cup rootbeer 2 scoops dead baby.
A little boy went to church. The priest said, "Get in the following positions: stand, then kneel, then bow." The little boy replies, "Can you hurry up and f**k me already?"
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
