You jokes
Who are you to believe if you don't believe in unicorns?
Believe in unicorns, and they'll believe in you!
Did you hear about the man that got fired from his can job? It was soda-pressing.
I ass big ass you :-)
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he.
What do you sing on a dead person's birthday?
"Happy Death-Day To You!"
What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?
— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.
A girl comes up to her dad and says, "Can I borrow the car tonight? I want to go to this party." Dad says, "If you give a head job..." The girl says, "You're my dad! How can you say that?" Dad says, "If you want the car..." The girl thinks, "Okay." She starts. Dad says, "That tastes like sh*t." Dad: "Yeah, your brother wanted the car this morning."
Knock knock. Who's there? Ach. Ach who? Bless you!
Why do you pay cash for the metro train in Newcastle upon Tyne?
If Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money.
P.S. The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to "When You Wish Upon A Star", with the castle being the Blue Peter ship instead.
What do you call a Censor with Autism?
A Censorspaz.
"Why don't you want to taco 'bout it?"
"Cause I'm nacho friend anymore."
Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?
A: Carlos.
There was a dude, he was like, "Yo dawg, you wanna die?" I said, "What is this, Friday the 13th?"
Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?
A receding hare-line!
Did you hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There's no menu. You get what you deserve!
Hey guys! It's Triple G. You can give me more ideas on jokes, mainly Fish and Sea jokes, as those are the jokes I specialize and only do best on in the comment section below. Please do feel free to thumbs down and comment on improvements, as well as thumbsing up and saying what you liked! :)
Au revoir, GGG