You Jokes

9/11

A retired George W. Bush is eating a donut at 7/11 and looks at it. "I'm so happy I did that." A guy overhears the conversation and says, "You're happy you bought that donut? Oh haha, I would be too. I love donuts!" George W. Bush then says, "Oh hahaha, you caught me," and then says, "Oh hahaha, you must have heard me wrong. I said, I'm so happy I did 9/11."

Sun

Question: What did the sun say to the little star?

Answer: Are you my SUN?

Oven

What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.

Ass

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took a dick in the ass.

Skeleton

What do you call skeletons having sex?

When the relationship is dead, but you're still fucking.

Husband

Wife: Honey, I love you.

Husband: I love you all.

Wife: Awww.......... Wait WHAT?!?!??!

Thanos

SPOILER ALERT...

I was going to tell you a joke about Thanos, but T. S. snapped it away!

Orphan

Teacher: "You can't be here after school without a parent!"

Orphan: -no response-

  • 3
  • Cow

    What do you call a cow with no legs?

    Ground beef......haha.....no one likes my jokes.

  • 5
  • Helium

    Hey John, how are you going?

    Helium, yeah good, what about you?

    (Hey Liam)

    Cookie

    How do you make Alabama cookies?

    Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.

    Mansion

    Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Alabama burned down?

    Almost took out the whole trailer park.