Year jokes
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
Why did Joe Biden pull out of the Afghanistan war?
Because it was over 18 years old.
I wanted to tell a commie a joke about food, but heβd have to wait 10 years to get it.
Happy New Year! ππππ
Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are only 5 years old, yet you know how to give great head.
Memes
Little Johnny: Hey, Dad, are you finally back with the milk?
Dad: Yea, but it's expired, so I'm going back to the "milk store" and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)
One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"
A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.
What country has been the hottest in recent years?
Sri Lanka, they had 3 bombs in a day!
Hey, Iβm not an alcoholic! I only drink 2 times a year. When itβs my Birthday, and when itβs not...
I must have at least 87 years of bad luck; every time I look in the mirror, it breaks!
Your forehead is so clear, like the Liberty Bell manual in 1876.
Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?
Because it was High School.
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?
Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...
Whatβs the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?
Theyβre both saying βOh my god my momβs gonna kill me!β
Bin Laden was the hide and seek champion for 10 years, 2001-2011.
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.
I was finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Yearβs Eve.
Donβt blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"