A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and see's a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running building momentum before launching himself at the nun catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement. He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nuns ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habbit and lifting her limp to her feet til face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace the drunk victoriously growled. Your not so bloody tough tonight are ya Batman.
Ya know life as a pufferfish is tuff. They get startled they the get hard.
knock knock whos there? lettuce lettuce who? lettuce in and ill tell ya
I said i was going to my flat i really meant ya girl
this ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap and in a few days he saw her again and he went up to her and said hey you gave me the clap and she said NO I DID NOT I sold it to ya
ya make 10 paintings, you arent an artist ya make 20 meals, you arent a chef but when i kill ONE PERSON, im a "horrible person" and a "menace to society"
Knock knock
who's there
orange
orange who
orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before.
Brrr it's fucking cold outside aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh how about the latest phone! Who me? Oh I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas ya filthy animals!
So a man asked another man what’s your name and he says what’s it to ya. So the guy asked agoim and he says what’s it to ya. Come to find out his name was what’s it to ya
doin ya mom oh yeah oh yeah doin doin ya mom
Why Did The Skeleton Have No Friends? He Was A Boner! Heheheh! Ah, See Ya Soon Kiddo. Im Goin On Break. Ill Give You Some Fried Snow Later!
Bee Jokes: "Hello"
"Oh hello buzzy!"
"Why are ya calling me Buzzy this whole time?"
"Because you BEE BUZZing! (Laughs)"
"It's not funny! Jokes are the worst, although I hate those Bee Jokes!"
"Chillax bro. Don't BEE a hater of jokes dude! (Laughs)"
"Aagh! You always had a choice, but I will sting ya face!"
"No! You BEE like pollen to make HONEY-moon. (Laughs)
"Stoooop!! I'm outta here, your worst fan."
"Fan?"
"Yes, your worst fan!"
"No! Fan!"
"What?! Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!!!"
"Ohhh! Buzzy's looking BEE-wind! (Laughs)"
little jonny bad ass was sitting on a porch one day and a preacher was in the house little jonny bad ass had to use the bathroom so he bangs on the door saying mom i half to use the bathroomn his mom ses wait so little jonny bad ass sow a hat on the step he lookes around and pulls his pants down and shits in the hat well a few later the preacher comes out and ses i see u have my hat well little jonny bad ass ses ya i cout the wolds fasts berd the preacher ses well let me see him little jonny bad ass ses no i dont know well the preacher ses ill put my handes by the hat you lift and ill cach him well little jonny bad ass lifted the hat and the preacher clapt his handes and little jonny bad ass ses now see the bird don shit and ran.
Have ya heard about the awesome fruit race? the lettuce was ahead but the tomato was able to ketchup!
Monkey:What ya doing Other monkey:Just you know "Hanging around"
Bad joke right i just can't think of something amazing it's like my brain is "Hanging"