world's jokes
I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.
When Stephen Hawking is ill 🤮, do you take him to Curry's PC World or the doctors? 😂😂😂😂
Hey, did you know that Stephen Hawking predicted the end of the world?
Well, not really. He predicted the end of *his* world.
When Stephen Hawking was feeling hungry, he used to call in to his local PC World for a megabyte and some microchips.
When Stephen Hawking died, did they take him to the hospital or PC World?
Riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. What am I?
Answer: A stamp.
Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died?
There was a mix up, and he was dropped at PC World instead of A&E!
My cock was in the book of world records...
The librarian told me to take it out.
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: The 9/11 victims. They went through 20 stories in seconds.
How were tire swings made?
A tire said, "Goodbye world," and hung himself.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 Victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus:] Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid. And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder. You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older. But the meteor men beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture.
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin. The water's getting warm so you might as well swim. My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.
[Chorus 2x]
Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas. I need to get myself away from this place. I said yep, what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see. So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus]
And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
What was purple and conquered the world?
Alexander The Grape.
Sonic can run around the world in a second. I can do it in 0.5, but Chuck Norris has already done it before us.
Sonic can run around the world in a second.
In that same time, Chuck Norris can run around the Universe.
Where would you take Stephen Hawking if he dies, the funeral directors or PC World?
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world.
There's 10 kind of people in the world. Those who know binary and those who don't.
Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.