Wordplay jokes

What do you call an ice skating dwarf?

A midget spinner.

Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.

Why aren’t orphan jokes funny?

The punchline isn’t apparent.

What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?

One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.

What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin Sea.

How does Jesus make tea?

Hebrews it.

What do you call a single bisexual?

All bi myself.

All these jokes are so offensive, Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it.

What do you call numbers that don’t stay in place?

Roamin’ Numerals.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?

A “Lickalottapuss”.

What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.

Why can't Michael Jackson ever win in a race? Because he always comes in a little behind.

What is a bald eagle's favorite dog breed?

A beagle!

What is Mozart doing right now? -- Decomposing.

What is Hitler's least favorite month?

Jewly.

Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."

I don't like these Undertale jokes. They just don't make any sense.

What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?

A cock sucker.

I hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though I think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldn't wanna hurt your funny bone, but I think your starting to get BONELY so I'll stop pulling your leg. Now get out before I give you a bad time.

Why doesn't my egg want to crack?

Because I hate my egg-sistence.