Women jokes
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?
This is Riley abortion clinic. Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to.
He says to the first one, "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny."
He says to the second one, "You are addicted to food, you named your daughter Candy."
Then the third one whispers to her son, "Come on, Dick, let's go."
Why is it best to date suicidal women? Because if there's no pulse, there's no need for consent.
New study reveals that women slightly overweight live longer... than the men who mention it.
90,900,00,1090,279402% of girls are raped. 67% of women are raped. So I guess girls are sexier than women! Who agrees? Please comment: Good or Bad.
How many white women does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. To hire the Mexicans.
A teacher asks a boy in her class, "If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?" The boy responds with, "None." The teacher asks why. "They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot." The teacher says, "The answer is 2, but I like the way you think."
Later, the boy asks the teacher, "3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking it." The boy says, "No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think."
What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.
What would Hitler be called if he abused women? Hither!
What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.
What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
Rape isn't a joke.
It's a type of way of making friends and to mate with other women.
It's a way of art, and works on anybody!
Like this if you agree.
The woman saw a cute lookin' cop. She had pulled up right next to him and said, "Hey, can I get your number?" He said, "Yeah, it's 911," and drove off.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?