Woman jokes
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.
The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
Why should old women never eat seafood?
'Cause then she'll start acting crabby.
I like my women thick, so if they aren't over 375 pounds, they're not stepping into my room.
A 28 year old woman, Olga, in Meshchovsk, Russia took justice into her own hands when a 32 year old male robber, Viktor, decided to rob her salon. She tied him, feeding him only Viagra, having sex with him over and over. After a few days, she released him after he stated he learned his lesson and wouldn't go to the police. He lied and went to the police anyways. Both were arrested.
After his sentence was over, Viktor sat down to speak to the local news. The reporter asked Viktor, "How was this whole ordeal?" Viktor replied, "I've had better."
My wife is a whore, so I pimped her out and broke her mentally and emotionally, taught her a good lesson of being a real woman loyal to her man. End of story, you women are bitches.
What does an orphan have in common with an 80-year-old woman? Their parents will never come back.
It’s true women do make less money than men.
But it’s their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Whereas women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.
Women will always be superior to men. After all, they are FEmale (Fe - iron, male - man).
You walk into an area that has big asses on the wall, and they feel lifelike, so you put your dick into them, and you go on the opposite side of the wall, and women are naked through the wall.
Why do trans women go by she/her?
Because if they went by her/she, they'd be Hershey's.
I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.
Life is like a penis.
Women make it hard.
What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
Only one of them stops sucking after you slap it.
What is the useless skin around the vagina called?
The woman.
Me: I will rape you!
Woman: NOOOOOO!!! I AM TOO SCARED TO GET "RAPED"!
Why do women be like this?
Why do leftists call their child Ariel?
So they can decide whether it wants to be a man, woman, mermaid, or washing powder.
What do you call a flat-chested emo girl?
A cutting board.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
Do you know how many women have been pope?
Nun.
A man and a woman get married. The woman was a retired hooker. The man was a poet.
The man said as they did 69, "You taste better than my most delicious gourmet meal." The woman said, "Well, you aren’t too bad either, but the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was Harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop." They got divorced that night.