Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
Woman Jokes
What's the difference between women and men?
Men have rights.
She be hubba on my bubba till I gum.
This bitch got mad at me because I couldn’t last four strokes. What the fuck are you mad at me for? My grandpa didn’t even survive one.
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
:/
Gays: I like men.
Straights: I like women.
Russia: Hole is hole.
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.
Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
What did one saggy boob say to the other?
"We better start getting some support around here, or people are gonna think we're nuts!"
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
Police Report: Looking for a female, light brown hair, blue eyes, freckles, and a small scar on her right check.
Last seen on CCTV wearing see-through bottoms, a pink top, and a vibrating dildo hanging out of her arse. If you find this woman, please get her to charge the dildo for excessive fun.
Why do trans women go by she/her?
Because if they went by her/she, they'd be Hershey's.
What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard.
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!"
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
Why are women’s feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
