My pregnate wife said we were gonna name the kid digorno. She wouldn't tell me why until she got an abortion and told me its not delivery its digiorno.
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
What's the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side.
Luigi was dying had two sons Bruno was handsome but Alberto was ugly He said Maria tell me is the is Alberto my son Yes Luigi his wife said and he died happily Wife said thank God he didn’t ask about the other one !!
Why was Stephen hawkings wife mad at
She cought him having an afair with his shoulder
when your wife gets pregnet and you dont want a kid just come on down to momma mias pizzareia and abortion clinic!
My wife and I have been married over 30 years. But don’t get me wrong, we still perform tricks in the bedroom. I sit up and beg, she rolls over and plays dead.
My fifth wife asked me to help her dig in the garden. Here we go again.
A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.
An elderly was happy to finally see his wife again and was packing. He told everyone about the trip. "I will see her in one week" A week later he died
My wife said I acted like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
Guy tells his pal...My wife is expecting. We're going to the clinic to see if it's a girl or boy. "Congrats man...what are you gonna name it if it's a boy? .... We're going with Trevor. Ok, what if it's a girl?... then we'll have an abortion.
What does Mickey's wife drive?
A Minnie-Van!!
I comforted my friend about his wife's death, until I found out who did it.
Most embarrassing moment during sex, GO!
James Arnold: my grandma walk in while I was knife raping my wife.
The Wife said "Honey! Do you like my new Teeth?"
The Husband replied "They remind me of stars Darling!" "Yellow and Far apart"
Three citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI. Their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot her. He walked out in shame and said he couldn't do it. The second guy had the same scenario. He put the gun up, but couldn't pull the trigger, so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario. He walked out and told the instructor, "The gun wasn't loaded, I had to strangle the bitch."
my wife found a rock and asked if it was exspenive and i said it leavarite she said is that exspensive and it told her leave it rite there
How does a cow introduce his wife?
Meet Patty