Why jokes
Why can't orphans have sex?
They don't know who daddy is.
Why do orphans eat their cereal dry? Their dad hasn’t come back with the milk.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Why did the chicken cross the towers?
Because he ordered a plane pizza and didn’t get to the other side.
Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.
Memes
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
Why does Helen Keller masturbate with her left hand?
She moans with her right.
Why was the Ethiopian baby crying?
It was having a mid-life crisis.
Why do giraffes have such long necks?
Because their feet smell!
Why is the wheel the best invention?
Because it's wheely wheely great!
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
Social distancing.
Why didn't Biden get the virus?
He sniffed everyone!
Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
Don't see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too, though.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
Why don't blind people like bungee jumping?
Because it scares the fuck out of dogs!
A mom cow's last words were to the mom cow's son. They were, "You are..." then died. The son thought that he was adopted, but then three years later, the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say, "You were adorable." Then she died once more. Then two years later, she rose from the dead for the last time to say to her son, "And that's why we adopted you."
I was going from Germany to Austria, and I accidentally crossed the border illegally. When the police caught me, they told me I was a Nazi. I asked them, "Why?" They said I didn't see the border.