Why jokes
Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"
Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"
Boy: "What do you mean?"
Friend and me: "We can show you."
Me: "I will tie the rope."
Friend: "I will push the chair."
Why doesn't a teddy bear eat? Because it is already stuffed.
Why didn’t the orphan play baseball?
Because I took the bat and swung it at their kneecaps, and now they can’t run. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Why did the stick fall?
Because he is a stick man.
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
Why do golfers bring a spare pair of socks?
In case they get a hole in one.
Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!
Why did the rapper bring a map to the concert?
To NAVIGATE his way through the CROWD.
You know why seven ate nine? Because 7, 8, 9.
Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?
Me: 😈
Why was Trump banned from music class? He kept putting his finger on D minor.
What was Clinton encouraged to get in college? A minor.
Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?
Because his last parents existed.
Why can't orphan kids play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the Wi-Fi password.
Why are fish not sleeping? 'Cause the bed is wet.
Why can't orphans play games?
Parents signed.
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the concert?
So he could DEFINE his own beats!
Why were the cows so noisy in the barn?
Because they had horns!
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."