Why jokes
Why do vegetarians give good head?
Because they’re used to eating nuts.
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?
Because they can’t ketchup.
Why did Beyonce say "to the left to the left"?
Because women don't have rights.
Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
The cabinet had sleeping pills.
Memes
Why does the ice cream have so many friends?
Because he’s cool.
Why did Hitler never go to a strip club?
He hated the Poles.
Why does the blonde stand in a corner when she's cold?
Because it's 90 degrees.
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge.”
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt.
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
Why did Paul Walker cross the street?
Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
Why do prostitutes love servicing zombies? They always leave a tip.
Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? He took a day off.
Do you know why I wish grass was emo? So it can cut itself.
Why does Michael Jackson like to play ping pong or table tennis? He likes to play with the little balls.
Why is it best to date suicidal women? Because if there's no pulse, there's no need for consent.
Why do lawyers use Viagra? To grow taller.
Why do priests appreciate educated children?
They don't spit.
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the doctor's office. When he gets there, the doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the doc why? The doc said, "So I can examine you!"
Why did Ms. Grapes 🍇 want to marry Mr. Grapes 🍇?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Why did the library book go to the doctor?
It needed to be checked out.