Why jokes
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Why is there AC in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
Why couldn't a lifeguard save the hippie? -- Because he was too far out, man.
..do i even need to explain ts..
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
Why can't Juice WRLD play COD Zombies? He can't handle 6 perks.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He doesn't know where home is.
Why can orphans only hit a triple in baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Why did nobody believe the little girl who got raped?
She said a monster attacked her.
Why did the guitarist go to prison?
'Cause he fingered A minor.
When Little Johnny was about 3, he got curious and stuck his hand up a mannequin's pants. His mom says, "No, Little Johnny, there are teeth up there that will bite off your hand." Little Johnny thinks, "Oh no, I can't do that again."
A few years later, he was 15 and he had a girlfriend, and they were making out. She says, "Why don't you ever stick your hand up my pants?" He says, "Oh no, my mom says there are teeth that will bite off my hand up there." She says, "No, there isn't, just look!" Little Johnny looks and says, "Well, no wonder there ain't no teeth. By the way, them gums look..."
So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.
They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't go home.
Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?
So he could be wanted.
why do orphans go to church?
because they can finally call someone "father."
Do you know why Santa's sack is so big? He only comes once a year.
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Why did the pope drink horse piss? Because a priest asked him what would he do for a Klondike bar? 🤪 😜