Why Jokes

Why is Santa's sack so big?

He only comes once a year.

Why can't blind people eat fish?

Because it's sea food.

Why was I stress eating on the train track?

To wait to get hit.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year? They don't have Mother's or Father's Day.

I’m a professional 😉

A man is shown in five different panels. In the first panel, he is yelling: "WHY DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH HER?". The second panel shows another man, who responds: "SHE WAS LYING THERE NAKED, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!". In the third panel, the first man is yelling: "THE AUTOPSY, THE FUCKING AUTOPSY!". In the fourth panel, he is throwing a chair, and yelling: "DON'T TELL ME HOW TO DO MY JOB!". In the fifth panel, he is pointing and yelling: "YOU ARE THE WORST VET ON EARTH!"

Why are Alabamians so resentful of immigrants?

They don't want their sons and daughters to have sex with anyone other than their siblings or relatives.

Johnny Depp, Michael Jackson, and Marilyn Manson all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Why don't you take a seat, right over there?" Turns out the bartender was Chris Hansen himself.

Why can't a t-rex clap?

Because it's dead.

Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

To find Pluto.

Why did the picture go to jail?

Cause it was framed!

I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut, so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.

Why do orphans go to church?

So they have someone to call father.

A kid walks in late to class. The teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" and he replies, "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake." Another kid walks in late to class, and the teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" and he replies, "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake." The last kid walks in and the teacher says, "Why are you late?...and why are you wet?" and the kid says back, "Remember, my name is Pebbles!!"