Why jokes
(BILL is sitting in the waiting room, fidgeting with his tie. MR. SMITH enters with a clipboard.)
MR. SMITH: (sternly) Good morning, Bill. Ready for your interview?
BILL: (nervously) Uh, yes, sir! I’ve prepared a lot for this!
MR. SMITH: (raising an eyebrow) Great! Let’s start with an easy question. Why do you want this job?
BILL: (confidently) Well, I want to help your company succeed! I believe in hard work and dedication!
MR. SMITH: (nods) Good to hear. Now, what’s your biggest weakness?
BILL: (eyes widening) I tend to be overly honest.
MR. SMITH: (leaning in) That’s not really a weakness.
BILL: (smirking) I don’t care what you think!
(MR. SMITH pauses, surprised, then bursts out laughing.)
MR. SMITH: (laughing) Okay, you’re hired! We need more honesty around here!
Why don’t rappers tell secrets?
Because they always end up DROPPING it.
Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?
Because good rappers always stand out!
Why is there no medication in Africa?
Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."
Y'all heard of Poptarts, eh?
Well why are there no Momtarts?
Because of the PASTRYarchy!
Why do orphans always have the newest iPhone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why do orphans cause trouble at school?
So the teachers will call their parents.
Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?
Because they took a day off.
Why was Sonic fast?
To be rolling around at the speed of sound, got places to go, gotta follow my lead.
Why is hand holding a couple thing? Because they touch each other's genitals anyway.
Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the studio?
Because he wanted to drop higher bars!
Why did the rapper start a gardening business?
He had mad ROOTS in the game.
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
Because it was all about the TIMING.
Why do gay men hate periods? Because they per Collins.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?
Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.