When jokes

When your plane heads for New York...

What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide?

When exactly my cult members drink the Kool-Aid.

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.

I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"

I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3

Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."

Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.

That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.

What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!

Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.

You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.

Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.

But at least lemonade came out!

Why was the orphan so successful?

Because when he was told "go big or go home," he only had one option.

Your mom is so fat that when she saw Moby Dick, she said, "We are family... even though you're bigger than me."

When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.

My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."

Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....

Good thing my brother's a little bit different.

You got the whole crowd of people laughing when looking at you.

That face needing some laughing pills.

What do you call it when you see nothing but pants? Brief psychotic disorder!

You're so fat that when you went outside, you broke the 2-meter rule for COVID.

The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.

Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?

A: His lips move.

Your friend is so fat, when he took the group pic, he was the background.