Whats jokes
What would you name a mummified squirrel?
Perhaps... Mumford?
What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Thumb nails.
What do kids call a balanced meal?
A hamburger in each hand! XD XD XD XD
What's a vampire's favorite fruit? A neck-tarine.
What did one mountain climber say to the other mountain climber?
Man, you are really on edge.
What did the hairdresser say to the power line?
"Want a power cut?"
What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?
We’re wiped out!
What is a rat's favorite dessert?
A chocolate mousse cake.
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
What did one man say to his friend who had a receding hairline?
He said, “Hey, friend, I can see that your head definitely has a brighter future than mine.”
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Q: What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
A: Downey.
What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.
Little Johnny goes to his mum and asks, "Mummy, what's rape?"
Little Johnny's mum answers, "The way you got here."
Sans, you lazybones, get up and do something.
Sans: I am doing something.
Papyrus: Oh yeah, what?
Sans: Thinking up a skele-ton of jokes.
Papyrus: SANSSSsSsSsSssSsSSsSsSsSSsSSsSsSsS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will end you.
Sans: What, does someone not have a funny bone? Oh wait, do you have a bone to pick with me? I have 206.
Teacher: Tell me a moral story.
Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.
Teacher: What is the moral even?
Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids drowning.
What did the poo say to the fart:
You blow me away!
If Bugs Bunny had Down Syndrome:
"Meeeehh, what's up, Downs?"