Whats jokes
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
What's a skeleton's favorite plant? A bone-zai tree. But if they don't like that one, how about a s-pine tree?
What's red and in a corner?
A baby with a razor blade.
What's green and in a corner?
The same baby three weeks later.
A baby skunk's mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn't know what he is.
So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks, "What are you?" The baby bunny replies, "Well, I'm a baby bunny. What are you?" The baby skunk says, "Well, I don't know, am I a baby bunny too?"
The baby bunny says, "No, you're not a baby bunny." So the baby skunk asks, "Well, what am I then?"
The baby bunny replies, "Well, you're not exactly blank and you're not exactly white, so you must be Mexican."
What joke do you tell an orphan?
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not your parents.
Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"
His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."
A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"
What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.
Them: You want some Lucky Harms?
Me: What are Lucky Harms?
Them: They're Lucky Charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.
What's the difference between Tyler and a rooster? A rooster says, "cock-a-doodle-doo," Tyler says, "any cock will do."
What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?
Two test tickles.
FIRST DATE
Man: "I work with animals every day." Woman: "Oh, how sweet! What is it that you do?" Man: "I'm a butcher..."
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
If the formula of water is H2O, then what is the formula of ice?
H2O cubed.
What do you call a sophisticated American?
A Canadian.
If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.
Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?
A. System of a Down's syndrome.
What's the difference between Mexicans and stoners? Stoners actually have papers.
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
What is a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A trom-bone 😂