Whats jokes
FIRST DATE
Man: "I work with animals every day." Woman: "Oh, how sweet! What is it that you do?" Man: "I'm a butcher..."
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat
What do you call a sophisticated American?
A Canadian.
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
What is a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A trom-bone 😂
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs ;)
A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."
A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."
<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*
Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."
What's the difference between Hitler and a feminist?
At least Hitler actually did something.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? -- The wheelchair.
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
What's Thanos' favorite game?
Half-life.
What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"
What do most 50-year-old men put inside their cars?
Children.
What is the first thing the disabled download on iTunes?
"They see me rolling, they hatin'."
What caused Captain Hook's death?
He accidentally used the wrong hand to wipe his ass.
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.
What's the best part about a dead prostitute?
The second hour is free.