Whats jokes
What do TVs and girls have in common?
They both show you stuff when you turn them on!
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?
Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.
What do you call a depressed person holding a knife?
Freedom yay! (so funny ikr)
What do Michael Jackson and math have in common? They are both hard for kids.
What’s the difference between criminals and orphans?
Only one is wanted.
Q: What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?
A: One got to finish a race.
I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.
What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.
What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.
What is red and tan and spins for about 50 mph?
A baby in a blender.
What do you get when a cow is caught in an earthquake?
You get a milkshake!
What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence?
Udder destruction.
What do you call a dead parrot?
Polygon.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.
I was crying at school, telling my friends my grandpa died. And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.
What's one of the worst motivational things to say to a suicidal person?
“Hang in there!”
What did the receptionist at the sperm bank say when you were leaving? "Thanks for coming!" 😉😉
What's the difference between life and death? Life hurts.
What's worse than waking up with a penis drawn on your face?
Finding out it was traced.
Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?
JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.