Whats jokes

Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?

Me: Oh, I wan-

Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.

Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.

What's a lesbian's favorite type of food?

Finger-food.

What do prime numbers and stoners have in common? The higher they are, the more spaced out they get.

What's a school shooter's favorite anime?

Assassination Classroom.

Little Johnny is walking around and peeks in his parents' room, catching them having sex. So he asks, "What are you guys doing?" and they reply, "Nothing, nothing! We're just, uh, making cake," and they send him away.

So he continues walking around, and he hears some strange noises coming from his brother's room. He walks in and catches his brother and his brother's girlfriend having sex and then asks him, "What are you guys doing?" and his brother yells, "Get out! We're making cake!"

So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says, "So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night, huh?" and she replies, "OMG! How'd you know!?" and Johnny replies, "Because I licked the icing off the couch."

What's the difference between my dad and cancer? Cancer doesn't leave you.

What do JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common?

“They both blow heads.”

What's the difference between Hitler and Logan Paul? At least Hitler had respect for the Japanese!

Q. What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. One has a functioning neck.

What do you call a depressed person holding a knife?

Freedom yay! (so funny ikr)

What do Michael Jackson and math have in common? They are both hard for kids.

What’s the difference between criminals and orphans?

Only one is wanted.

I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.

What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.

What do you get when a cow is caught in an earthquake?

You get a milkshake!

What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?

The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence?

Udder destruction.

What do you call a dead parrot?

Polygon.

What do you call a Mexican Baptism?

Bean Dip.

I was crying at school, telling my friends my grandpa died. And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"

When a military person dies, we shoot all night. When a drunkard dies, we drink all night. When a Christian dies, we pray all night. What if a prostitute dies? What should we do? Please tell me.