Whats jokes

Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, "Who created the Earth?" And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, "MY GOD!" And the teacher says, "Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth." Sally sits down.

Then, the teacher asks, "Where do you go after you live a good life?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, "HEAVENS TO BETSY!" And the teacher says, "Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life." Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.

And then, the teacher asks the class, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around and says, "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I'm gonna lose it!" And the teacher faints.

What do you call the space in between Kim Kardashian's breasts?

Silicon Valley.

What's the difference between a hamster and a cigarette?

They're both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

What is burned dark and glued to the wall?

A bad electrician.

What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?

One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.

What is a pirate's favorite letter?

You'd think it'd be R, but really his heart will always belong to the C.

What do girls and rocks have in common?

The flat ones get skipped.

When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?

Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.

What’s the difference between hungry and horny?

Where you put the cucumber 🥒

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.

What's the difference between you and Hitler?

Hitler knew when to kill himself.

So, a daughter asks her father, "Dad, what is your opinion on abortions?" Her father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?" The daughter responds, "But I don't have a sister... Oh."

What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?

He wipes his butt.

What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.

What's the only part of a vegetable you cannot eat?

Wheelchair.

What is anonymous 🤔 oral masturbation? the politically correct word for anonymous gay fellatio from a 🕳 glory hole inside a 📖 adult book store

A man is at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. A few years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”

What does BLM stand for?

Bisexual Lives Matter.

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

What do gay people and mice have in common?

They both hate pussy cats!