Whats jokes

What do emo boys and emo girls have in common? They both wanna die and cut so they can die faster, but they are already dead, already dead to me!

What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?

Yung Flung Dung.

What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?

I beat both of them.

GF: What do you think of our love?

BF: Count the stars in the sky.

GF: Aww... It's infinity!

BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.

I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.

What would they do? Go to their family?

What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"

What do gay horses say?

"Hay ya'lllllllllllllll!"

Dad: What time do you wanna go to the dentist?

Daughter: *tooth hurty*

Dad: All right.

Hey, Mom, I'm back from the circus parade. It was amazing! First came the elephants, then came the tigers in the cage, and then came a beautiful lady on a white stallion. Oh, and what came after her?

Asked the mother, "Dad and every sailor in the state of Tennessee," said the boy.

What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a parakeet?

Shredded tweet!

What do you call a person with no nose and no body?

Nobody knows.

What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them.

A kid had school today.

He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)

What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?

They get choked.

My son said that bully needs a pounding, then I say, "Yeah, right, that is what I said and did to your mother." My son opens his mouth and freezes. I guess he knew what I was talking about.

What's the difference between a picture of Jesus and the real Jesus?

The picture only takes one nail to hang.

What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?

A sourpuss.

What do you call an orphan taking a picture?

A self-portrait.

What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.