Whats jokes
What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?
"Can you show me what rape is?"
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Michael Jackson.
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What are Michael Jackson's pronouns?
He, he.
What do you call a group of emo kids?
The suicide squad.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite game? Jacks.
Why? He loved to play with the little balls.
What's the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What TV shows do orphans not like?
"Family Guy."
What’s the difference between Jesus and Maddie McCann?
One had the last supper.
What's the difference between a baby and a brick?
A brick doesn't cry when you throw it on a wall.
H: *walks into bedroom* Why are you packing your bags?
W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.
*Later that day*
W: *walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags* What are you doing?
H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.
In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.
My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.
What do you call blue and orange at the bottom of a pool?
A baby with flat armbands!
What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house.
Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood.
Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job.
My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I'm good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
What's the difference between cancer and a Nazi? Cancer doesn't discriminate.
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
One day, Little Johnny went to his grandma's house, and she asks, "Do you like nuts?"
Little Johnny says, "Yes, I like nuts."
His grandma says, "Okay then, grab them out of the cabinet." So Little Johnny went and grabbed them, and he was sad after he grabbed them. His grandma then says, "What's wrong?"
Little Johnny says, "I thought they were real nuts," and his grandma fainted.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.