Whats jokes

Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.

What was the drug addict's favorite nursery rhyme?

I'm a little crack pot short and stout, put that crack pipe in my mouth, sell my body or sell my couch, get that lighter and smoke me out!

What do you call a gay dinosaur?

A mega-sore-ass.

What is the best way to get gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?

Two swallows.

What do dark humor and kids with cancer have in common? They never get old.

What passengers were happy that the Titanic sank?

The lobsters in the kitchen.

Q: What does an orphan call a selfie of themself?

A: A family portrait.

What do an Apple company and an orphanage have that are different?

Apples actually get picked... Unlike little Timmy here... He's been here for 16 years.

What's the favorite song of an Emo?

"Chain Hang Low."

What did the orphan say to his parents?

I'm tripping balls right now!

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender?

A boner.

What does LMAO mean? Launching Missiles At Orphanages.

What are the similarities between the twin towers and my ex?

They both went down on my dad.

What is the opposite of Progress?

Congress.

What's better: nailing Jesus or getting nailed?

Depends on who's sucking.

Orphan: What are you doing tonight?

Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.

What do classical musicians do when they die?

They decompose.

What's the difference between a black person and an apple?

An apple chooses to hang.

What's the difference between an apple and a black man?

Apples look better hanging on a tree.