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Why did the pope drink horse piss? Because a priest asked him what would he do for a Klondike bar? π€ͺ π
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
What did the sea do when it saw the beach?
It waved!
Whatβs the similarity between your uncle and your hands?
They can both do dirty things.
What do you do when a baby starts to cry?
You use more lube.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
A turtle is crossing the road when heβs mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, βI donβt know. It all happened so fast.β
What is harder than steel?
Michael Jackson on a primary school oval. π
The teacher asks, "Who is a Trump fan?" Everyone in the class, wanting to be liked by their teacher, all put their hands up, except for Little Johnny. The teacher asks, "Little Johnny, why are you being different again?" Little Johnny says, "Because I'm not a Trump fan." The teacher asks, "Why are you not a Trump fan?" and Little Johnny says, "Because my dad's a democrat and my mum's a democrat so I'm a democrat." And then his teacher says, "So if your dad was an idiot and your mum was a moron, what would that make you?" And Little Johnny replies, "A Trump fan."
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef......haha.....no one likes my jokes.
What does NASA stand for?
Not A Space Agency.
What does an emo do on Halloween? They hang like a decoration.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!π
A girl asked, "Can I have some nuts too?"
Boy: "Sure, what ones ;)"
What do oranges sweat?
Orange juice. ππβ€οΈ
Punch an orphan in the face what they gonna do? Tell there parents
What type of teacher doesn't fart in public?
A private tutor/tooter.
What was on Stephen Hawking's gravestone? "Intel inside."
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
