Whats jokes
What is a paedophile’s favourite symphony?
Amadeus Mozart’s special flute in A minor.
What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?
The Chinese kid has a home.
What did the bowler say when the balls were on the lane and the pin? They said, "Strike!" 😂😂😂😂
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.
So, I walked up to my grandma and I said, "What color would you be on a rainbow cupcake?" She just turned 61, ok, ok. So I'm like, "I got it, I got it, ok, ok." She's like: "Ok, what color?" I say: "Grey."
If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
What did the kid say to the toilet?
"Did you order a number two because I got one ready for you?"
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter; it ain’t coming to you.
What is the oldest animal in the world?
A zebra—it is black and white.
A local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing bet of one thousand dollars that their bartender could squeeze a lemon dry until all the juice ran into a glass, and anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried but failed. Over time, weight lifters, lumberjacks, men in the Army, and etc. But still, nobody could do it.
One day, a scrawny little man came in wearing thick glasses and a cheap suit and said in a tiny squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said, "okay," and he grabbed a lemon and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rhine to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the one thousand dollars and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight lifter, or what?" The man simply replied, "I work for the IRS."
What is a meatball without spaghetti? A cow.
My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"
I said, "Paper."
She said, "Really?"
I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
What's the difference between a brand new Oldsmobile and a brand new Raping?
...Rape.
What's sticky and brown? A stick!
Guy #1 is being picked up by Guy #2 from the hospital.
Guy #1: Oh man, I just got my prostate checked. It's not looking good.
Guy #2: Why, what is it?
Guy #1: Turns out, I have prostate cancer.
Guy #2: Oh man that sucks...
Guy #1: Yeah, it's a real pain in the ass!
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? One alive at the bottom.