Whats jokes
What did one pillow say to the other?
Nothing, meh, they just sang a song about a rogue chicken whose feathers had been sacrificed to make them.
What happens when you search nudes on my phone?
Nothing, I don't have any.
So I'm a cow, guess what my dad thinks of that? He says I'm a loooosmer.
What do we call a gay Canadian?
Sophisticated cunt.
What falls and never gets hurt? Rain ☔
What do dogs eat? Dog food.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
Jurassic Park.
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
What do you call a man with no toes?
No Toe Joe.
What time is it when you need to go to the toilet?
Two-ply!
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
What do Asian people eat?
Rice.
What's the difference between leafmen and leafwomen? Palm trees.
Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"
Wanking.
What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap the mosquito, it stops sucking.
What do you get when you cross a cat and a dinosaur? A cat-astrophe!
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter?
My last if she knows what's good for her.
What do you say to toast with bad shoes?
"Butter those."
What do you call sex?
Making cake.
Sans: haha... Paps: what? Sans: i KNEW it was gonna rain today. Paps: that's nearly impossible, how? Sans: i could feel it in my bo- Paps: OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!