Whats jokes
What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?
They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.
What bird is good at gaming? A game bird.
What the sigma?
A gingerbread man walks into the doctor’s office with a broken arm. He asks the doctor, “Doc, what should I do? My arm is broken!”
The doctor then looks at him and says, “Have you tried icing?”
What's the difference between Canada and the USA?
In the USA, Trump is sitting in the Oval Office.
In Canada, he'd be sitting in the waiting room of a MAiD clinic.
What do you call an @EB with no ears?
An Explain B.
"What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?"
"Sofishticated."
What did the egg say to the tuna?
What word starts with “F” and ends in “uck”?
Firetruck.
What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.
What do Americans and stars have in common?
They both love shooting up.
What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.
What do pigs use to clean up? Hogwash.
What's a zebra? A couple sizes bigger than an A.
What is 9+9? 18.
What is 9+10? 19.
What is 9+11? -2996.
What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
Say what you will about pedophiles. At least they drive slowly through school zones.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
My father always used to say:
"What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."
Until the accident.
What did an orphan say to its father?
Nothing.