Whats jokes
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
What's the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Answer: The mosquito stops sucking if you slap hard enough.
Africa has every gun except for what?
A water gun.
What do Gay Men and Minorities have in common?
My dad hates them both!
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Beef stroganoff.
Why didn’t the orphan play baseball?
Because I took the bat and swung it at their kneecaps, and now they can’t run. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What is a depressed kid's favorite game?
Hangman.
What's the bad version of "Fuck Nirvana, rape me?"
What is a cheetah's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
What is one thing humans do before they eat?
They beat their meat to make nuggets.
What's a penguin's favorite relative?
What was the thing that Beethoven used the most?
THE OVEN! (BeethOVEN)
What's the difference between a dick and a rock?
One's hard.
What fell first, the emo kid or the leaf? The leaf, 'cause the emo kid just hung.
What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.
What's black and yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of orphans.
What does a man masturbating and a mayo bottle have in common?
They can both squirt out their cum.
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.