Whats jokes
Vote Biden or Trump, I like neither, but I want to know what the world would say. (Don't judge other people.)
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
Hello worstjokesever.com, I am not typing but instead using a microphone to speech, ding me a period.
I don’t see what’s coming up, but I don’t know why I am sending, so it will be random or funny or just stupid, LOL. So like and subscribe and...
What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet?
At least when a bullet kills someone, it’s actually fired.
What can a duck eat for a snack? Saltine quackers!
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.
My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.
What do you call a person with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
What what's the cloud private place to go? Among us, cows.
Hello, are you there?
Yes, who are you?
My name is Watt.
What’s your name?
Watt’s my name.
Yes, what is your name?
My name is John Watt.
John What?
Yes, are you Jones?
No, I’m Knott.
Will you tell me your name?
Will Knott.
Why not?
My name is Knott.
Not what?
Not Watt, Knott!
*hangs up*
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.”
“I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"
What were my great grandpa's last words?
"SHIT MG42!!!"
What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.
The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"
What show do orphans hate?
"American Dad."
What do you call a reverse exorcism?
It's where a demon pulls a priest out of a child.
Hi, I'm new here and I'm 11. I'm just bored and want a girlfriend.
Does anyone have Snapchat or Twitter? I can show you what I look like ;)
Why did the orphan go to the woods? To take a *what*?