Whats jokes
What's the difference between an egg and a good wank?
You can beat an egg.
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly, but a fly cannot bird.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What was the worse purchase America ever made?
Spending billions on two rice cookers in 1945.
Couldn't believe how much of a bad mood my work mate was in this morning. So I decided to ask him what was the matter and if everything was OK with his wife, Flo.
He then broke down crying and said when he got home the night before, he caught his wife in bed with the plumber. I tried to console him as best as I could, but he just couldn't get over flow.
What's an orphan's most hated show?
The Fosters.
What's an orphan's favorite store?
Home Depot.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
What do women and dog turds have in common?
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
What do food and dark humor have in common? Some people don’t get it.
What's the food orphans can't eat?
Family-sized ice cream.
Guess why orphans can't play baseball? Because they don't know what home is.
So in prep class, the students were asked to write a letter to their grandparents for Grandparents Day.
Little Johnny's friend, Little Sally, wrote things like, "Thank you," and, "You are so nice!" And Little Johnny goes, "What are you doing? You got it wrong!" So Sally says, "What do you mean? It's a letter." Little Johnny says, "Why did you do it like that? Just write a letter from the alphabet like the teacher said!" Then he says, "I wrote a J to remind them of me!"
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
What two things can you never have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner!
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
What do you call it when orphans take a family photo? A selfie!
What do you call Canadian weed? Canadabis.