Whats jokes
Q. What did the United Healthcare CEO say after he got shot? A. I don't know. I don't own a Ouija board.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don't get some support soon, people are gonna think we're nuts.
Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?
A. The Jello has a higher IQ.
What do you call a white person from Africa?
Albino.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One kneels to pray, one kneels to pay.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
This bitch got mad at me because I couldn’t last four strokes. What the fuck are you mad at me for? My grandpa didn’t even survive one.
Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.
What do you say to a woman in a wheelchair with no arms or legs?
"Nice tits."
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
Mom: Clean your room! Me: No, it’s my room, and I don’t want to clean it. Mom: You are nothing like Mrs. Smith’s daughter. Me: Well, I’m not Mrs. Smith’s daughter now, am I? You are the worst. Why are you trying to compare me with Mrs. Smith’s daughter? I’m not her, OK? I am not her, so stop! Mom: Do you know what? I pushed you out of my hula for 43 minutes! Do not make me hate you, because guess what? I brought you into the world, and I can take you out of it! Me: Bro.
A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."
And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
What kind of experience does a feminazi have for being a feminist?
Being a bitch.
What do orphans play on Roblox?
Adopt Me.
What is the legal term for shoplifting?
10 fingers discount.