Whats jokes
If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.
If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"
I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane. Man next to me said, "You know we're going to New York, right?" I told him I just wanna know what I got into.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
What should we want?
Racecars.
When should we want them?
NEOWWWWWWWWWWWM!
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
I have no eye deer!
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two until they divided into multiple pieces.
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
What do you call a rapper who works at the BANK?
Lil Teller.
What tree is every emo kid trying to find?
The hanging tree.
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
What’s the difference between weed and pussy?
If you can smell weed from across the room, it means the weed's good.
What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?
Some people don’t pick it.
Why do Black people go to a confession stand at the Catholic Church?
They wanna know what it’s like to speak to a father.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
What comes after 69?
Period.
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”