Whats jokes
What do you call a priest that likes juice?
A Capriest Sun.
A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:
"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."
What’s a kid with Down syndrome's favorite candy... Grunts.
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
Three men die at the same time and go to Heaven. St. Peter says to them, "It's going to be a long journey to heaven, so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives."
"We'll start with you, Michael. Since you were quite the womanizer and cheated on your wife multiple times, you will be getting a Toyota." The man, embarrassed, left in the Toyota.
"Nolan, you were better; you cheated on your wife twice, so I will give you a Mercedes. Now, as for you, Mark, you never cheated on your wife; you are an absolute saint, so I will be giving you a Lamborghini."
The man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car, and he asked the man in the Lamborghini, "What the hell is going on?"
The man in the Lamborghini says, "I just saw my wife riding through the streets of Heaven on roller skates!"
What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
What do you call a Deranged Psychotic Woman with a Stupid Hairdo?
Answer: Keri Lake!
What is a redneck virgin?
Answer: A seven-year-old that can run faster than her brothers!
What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.
What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.
What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.
Doctor asks his patient, "What is your zodiac sign?"
Patient replies, "Cancer." Doctor says, "What a coincidence!"
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
What did the fat say to the other fat? I am fatey.
What does an orphan say a lot? "Where is my house?"
What do you call a virgin from Alabama?
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970, and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband.
She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband?
He was a Christian, so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? The Bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes, it does, and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? That's not funny.
I'll tell ya what's funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
What's black and white and red all over?
The darkness of your heart, the dishonor of your lies, and the embarrassment you feel when busted for both.