Wet jokes
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
My mum found a chest that was wet, and it had a child in it. She asked me what it was for. I said I put kids in it and chuck it in a river until they are dead.
Why was the kid's report card all wet?
Because it was below "sea" level.
A fish was swimming around in a pond when he noticed a fly flying around about six inches above the water. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, I could have myself a nice meal."
There was a bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, that fish will come up for that fly, and I can catch that fish and have myself a nice meal."
There was a hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will go for the fish, and I can shoot the bear and have myself a nice meal."
There was a mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich and I can have myself a nice meal."
There was a cat in a tree watching the mouse watching the hunter watching the bear watching the fish watching the fly. He thought, "if that fly drops six inches, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, drop his sandwich, the mouse will go for the sandwich, and I can catch that mouse and have myself a nice meal."
Then it all happened.
The fly dropped six inches.
The fish came up and caught the fly.
The bear came out and caught the fish.
The hunter got up to shoot the bear and dropped his sandwich.
The mouse went for the sandwich.
The cat jumped from the tree, missed, and landed in the pond.
The lesson that can be learned here is that every time a fly drops six inches, a pussy gets wet.
I went for a swim in the river that crosses Mexico, and I saw a Mexican, aka a wetback, swimming across. I asked, and he said, "I'm a wetback."
1950: In the future there will be flying cars.
2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson.
One time in the butt. Two times in the butt. Three times in the butt makes a slut hot and wet.
Me and Jesus are really close; he even turns the light on for me when I go pee in the middle of the night. Well, that is what I thought until the fridge was wet.
Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset. She said it's too small, so that's all. But later that day, he wanted to say, "Every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lying." She started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all. Everyone said, "Fly away big chunky balls."
How do fuck a really fat chick?
Roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.
What happens to teeth when they go in water?
Bro, I dunno, they get wet?
Why didn't the squirrel want to go swimming? Because he didn't want to get his nuts wet!
Weather is like sex. Once in a while you need to get wet.
What do you get when you throw a pebble in the ocean?
A wet pebble.
When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"
I want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head.
Why was Wet scared of Water? Because he was the water.
What did Jim say to Jeff?
"I killed your ham."
What do you get when you put a clown, a peodophile, a gay wet person?
Answer: YOUR DAD
Shorts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin. When it's sniff, stick it in. It goes in dry and comes out wet, And the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag.
It's not what you think it is. It's a Lipton tea bag.
Get your mind together!