Weight jokes

Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!

Your momma is so fat, she can't even go skinny dipping.

Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.

What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?

A pool table.

Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.

Yo mama was so fat, Huggy Wuggy couldn't fit his arms around her!

Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"

Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"

Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."

Your mama's so fat, when she went to the movies, she sat next to everyone.

Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND the house.

The Earth was flat once. 'Til yo mama got buried.

Yo mama so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?

An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.

What did the fat guy say when he fell off the ladder? "Catch me!"

What do you call someone 400lbs with a beer? A heavy drinker.

Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.

Yo mama so fat, when she ran... oh wait never mind.

Yo mama so fat, she needs two watches for each timezone.

Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.

Jo Mama is so fat, I left her printing last year, and she is still printing!