Weight jokes
Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
Yo momma so fat!
Yo mama so fat, she orbits the sun!
Don't make fun of fat people. They already have a lot on their plate.
Yo mama so fat, when she landed on the earth, the earth cracked like eggs. LOL.
Why did the ground crack? Because of your mum!
"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."
"You look like you've lost some weight."
"Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!"
Yo mama so fat, she can't pick up a dumbbell... the dumbbell pick her up.
Me: Stepping on a scale to weigh myself.
Everyone else in the minefield...
Yo mama’s official weight (in tonnes)
99593927273949592827385959599282738595939282759593827395828192948472937593817294728275957292739584728459398284854982835884838285849292857483838385838294958483823884958383947391959593817495827394858272959573939488492949595837829374758483848497483919396849294858203957293858930375938475937393949292949848215722935375838283848382883839393949583929459939294949493928174759284759927495910305838385848292958293959.
Your mama is so fat, One Punch Man had to punch twice.
Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f
* * *
Fat people: Do I look beautiful when I eat a pack of chicken?
Me: Yes, you look like a bunch of boulders crashing into each other.
Fat: Dang...
Me: Shut up, Jon Brower Minnoch.
Yo mama so fat, she is 4 feet tall laying down.
What's the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
140 calories.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
120 pounds.
Your mama is so fat, she broke the stairs to Heaven.
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
Yo mama so old, on her birth certificate it said "expired."
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, Skittles popped out.
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on Walmart, the prices went down.
Yo mama so poor, she chases a garbage truck with a shopping list.
Yo mama so ugly, she made the devil go to church.