What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?
Put them in a barking lot!
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!
What's fun to search for in investigation?
The Milky Way!
What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?
R2 Detour.
High school students are also more interesting to see, but they are you on your way. Just kidding! 🤣
Sleep paralysis for the first time and this is what I see except it's face and body is way more stringy and hollow.
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
What did Jesus say when he was left hanging on the cross?
"Well this is one hell of a way to spend my Easter vacation!"
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
Why can’t orphans play baseball??
Because they can’t find their way to home plate.
Love is the best picture you can use to be able for her and I was able for her in the best place for her and I have to be honest and a great team of the team and the way it goes is the first 4th year of my life in my life as a new 💕.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
Me: “You guys wanna know a cool fact?”
Friend 1: “Yeah.”
Friend 2: “Yea.”
Me: “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.”
Friend 3: “I love anime.”
Friend 1 & 2: “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Me: *Laughs at Friend 3*
Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.
Your lips are so big, it turns the Grand Canyon sideways.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Hi, my name is Uncle Joe, and I like kids in a way that makes their parents not trust me anymore.
Why do we even live? We're just gonna die anyway, so what's the point?
If you're sleeping, and you fall in your dream, you may have died, and the angels dropped you.
Or you don't wake up, and you were on your way to hell.
