Water jokes
"Nepal is a good place because it has been a great time for me."
What's yellow but can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
The Titanic basically nominated all the passengers for the ice bucket challenge.
Why was the sea sad? Because it was blue.
Jack and Rose went on a cruise to do it in the water.
Jack seldom wore a condom, and now they have a daughter.
Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!!! 😂
They say they found water on Mars. Mars 1, Africa 0.
Captain of the Titanic: “Where’s all that f***ing water coming from?”
My mum found a chest that was wet, and it had a child in it. She asked me what it was for. I said I put kids in it and chuck it in a river until they are dead.
What is yellow and does not float well?
A school bus.
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
If the formula of water is H2O, then what is the formula of ice?
H2O cubed.
The Arabian Sea is in which state?
Liquid.
What's written on the bottom of a Belgian swimming pool?
"No smoking."
What did the fish say when seeing his best mate?
"I sea him!"
Why is the beach friendly?
Because it waves!
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks, “A Bloody Mary?”
The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me.”
“Hot water?”
“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea.”
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.