Want jokes
Hi everyone, today I am taking requests for anything you want me to say.
I smell ice a mile. Titanic, I want to iceberg.
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
Why do orphans play GTA 5?
To get wanted!
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because she wanted to have an affair with the rooster.
What did the fish say to the other fish?
"I want my life to be H2O-ver!"
I just wanted to say, Prince, that that "qwen" you were chatting with is totally fake! I haven't talked to you all day, I swear!
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
Why did the orphan run away?
They wanted to go home.
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn’t all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.
Do you want to know how the NY Jets got their name?
Why did the cow cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to go to a moooooooooooooooooooooooovie.
The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent, but had not phoned in.
Needing to have an urgent work problem resolved, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted by a child's whisper, "Hello."
"Is your Mummy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with her?"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Daddy there?"
"Yes."
"May I talk with him?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was someone with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anyone else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to the ambulancemen and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A helicopter," answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed a helicopter."
Alarmed, confused, and a little frustrated, the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle..."Me!"
A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender asks what he wants. The man says, "I would like one beer for me and one for the road."
Roses are red, I have no money, I want to be dominated by a goth mommy.
Why did Pikachu chase Ash?
Because he wanted to Ketchum.