Wanna

Wanna jokes

Suicide

I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder

Hide-and-seek

Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*

Cutter

Wanna hear somethin' ironic?

When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can't stop cutting.

Circle

You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.

Body

A woman went out on a date and said, “I’m thirty-one with the body of a sixteen-year-old.” The man responded, “Wanna show me? 😏” The woman took him back to her house and opened her freezer and said, “Take a look.”

Emo

An emo texted a tree, "Wanna hang out?"

The tree ghosted her.

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  • Little Johnny

    Little Johnny was playing with his train and said, "All you motherf*ckers who want to get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who want to get on, get on." His mother hears him and asks, "Is that you cussing?" The mother said, "Go to your room for 1 hour." Little Johnny goes to his room, then comes back one hour later and said, "All you motherf*ckers who wanna get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who wanna get on, get on, and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay, go ask the b*tch in the kitchen."

    Lie

    One time this kid came back from school and said, "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said, "Good news please," and the boy said, "I got 100% on my math test today." and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said, "Now to the bad news, I LIED!"

    Dad

    You wanna know what I want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

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  • Refrigerator

    You wanna know what's the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? "A refrigerator doesn't moan when I put my meat in it."

    Condom

    So, two condoms walk by a gay bar. What does one condom say to the other? "Hey, wanna get 'shit-faced?'"

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  • Sex

    A son walks up to his dad and says, "Dad! I just had sex for the first time."

    The dad goes, "Great! Wanna sit down and talk about it?"

    The son says, "I can't sit right now, my butt is very sore."